Stoners Seal Teal Deal, Feel it's a Real Steal

Just days after the trade that brought Sebastien Le Toux to Allentown as the first player in Pennsylvania Stoners FC history, management finalized another deal that saw rising star and ex-Canadian Teal Bunbury become the second member of an already potent strike force. Forced to land at the larger Lehigh Valley International Airport due to logistical issues at quaint Queen City Municipal, Bunbury was greeted by gaggles of Stoners fans ecstatic that they are watching the roster forming before their very eyes. Asked about the opportunity to help lead an expansion franchise, Bunbury had this to say:

"It should be exciting, eh?"

Eh, indeed.

Le Toux Good To Be True

In a deal that will forever change the history of the young Pennsylvania Stoners FC franchise, Sebastien Le Toux joined the Allentown-based squad in exchange for the team's first round selection in this year's BSL Draft. The Frenchman was so excited to join the expansion side that he hopped on the next flight into Queen City Municipal Airport to make himself available for a late-night press conference which announced his arrival to thousands of delirious fans. For anyone out there who was confused, they were not booing. The fans were simply shouting "LE TOOOOOOOUUUUUUUX! LE TOOOOOOOUUUUUUUX!" One particularly enthusiastic female fan even offered to carry the available bachelor's first child.

"Allentown does seem like a great place to raise a child," quipped Le Toux. "But in all seriousness, it is an honor to be introduced as the first-ever Stoners player. The fans here are great, and I can't wait to get out on the pitch for my new team."

But Sebastien and the fans were not the only ones excited on this fortuitous night. In a rare public appearance, the Partnership treated us with this prepared statement:

"The opportunity to bring in a player like Seba was one we could not resist. What he was able to do in his breakout season last year was simply incredible. Many experts seem to doubt that he can repeat his success, but we have faith that Seba has plenty left in the tank to silence his detractors."

After their brief words, the Partnership made a quick exit but not before promising the fans a season to remember and leading a few raucous chants.

An eventful preseason continued with the Stoners' acquisition of its first player, but it is far from over. Stay tuned for further announcements in the coming days and weeks leading up to First Kick on March 15.