Wednesday, April 19, 2017

Saturday, March 11, 2017

Week 2 Lineup

Bullish expectations following a Week 1 win should be tempered a bit by the dick punch Mother Nature issued to the Stoners' Starting XI. Star scorers Cyle Larin & Juan Agudelo are forced to the reserves as their match in snowy New England has been postponed. Sad!

Friday, March 3, 2017

Pennsylvania Stoners | Week 1 Lineup

Stoners Announce Week 1 Lineup

Back from the dead and grateful, the Stoners are stoked for their return to BSL action. Coach has the team amped and ready for the season after a dank preseason. The fans, in a sign of their anticipation, have been camped outside JBC all week singing songs of peace and happiness.

Behold, the Stoners are back and promise not be be dropouts as is stereotypical.

Yamil Asad (ATL)
Ambroise Oyongo (MON)
Bofo Saucedo (RSL)
Brooks Lennon (RSL)
Tim Howard (COL)

Monday, February 20, 2017

Stoners Swap Set of Selections for Set of Scorers From Same Squad

The first big deal of the Stoners' latest era is in! The 5th and 6th round draft choices for this years Bigtime Soccer League Draft have been sent to Cumberland AC in exchange for two dynamic USMNT midfielders, Darlington Nagbe & Sacha Klejstan! Look at those winning smiles!! Wow!!!

The Boys Are Back In Town

After nonstop clamor from the ardent fanbase over the last 2 years, the until-recently dormant Pennsylvania Stoners are set to make their triumphant return to the Bigtime Soccer League. The Partnership were overwhelmed by calls to bring back the Big Blue & Yellow. It's time to GET STONED™!

Mike & Javi are proud to announce they have acquired the services of a potent pair of players to head the frontline. Please put your hands together for your Original New (Again) Stoners Dom Dwyer & Cyle Larin! No word yet on whether the Stoners plan to exclusively field players from non-US English-speaking countries. Stay tuned for more moves!